The Alps are days away and the racing is flat and slow. Thank god the Tour has Bradley Wiggins.

Despite losing 15 seconds in the traditional Bastille Day melee on Tuesday night, Wiggins has been one of the stories of the opening 11 days.

A track specialist whose best finish in two Tours is a dizzying 124th, he has left the Pyrenees close enough to the GC contenders (and Rinaldo Nocentini) to perhaps pinch a podium spot if things fall his way in the Alps.

How distant all this looked in 2001, when Wiggins got his start with the Linda McCartney Racing Team. An all-vegetarian outfit, theLMRT soon went the way of Wings, collapsing under a mountain of debts and uneaten tofu.

Traumatised by days of broccoli and ‘Band on the Run’, Wiggins sought refuge in track racing. His only Tour outings with Cofidis in 2006-07 earned him a reputation for climbing startlingly similar to the Broom Wagon’s for hard work.

So what has changed? Wiggins has joined a better team, lost one ninth of his body weight and says he “worked my arse off”. He assumes nearly everyone else thinks he is on drugs.

That impression is hardly going to be lessened by his hobby of freaking the hell out of the peloton – which is really what has won him our enthusiastic support.

“I was shouting on one of the climbs the other day,” Wiggins explained, convincingly impersonating Vyvyan from the Young Ones. “Just messing around trying to chill everyone out. Levi [Leipheimer] was going nuts at me: ‘What the hell’s the matter with you? Are you crazy?'”

Oh Bradley, you had us at ‘shouting’.

On the climb to Arcalis, when he unexpectedly matched Evans, Armstrong and Leipheimer, Wiggins revealed he had to check other riders’ faces to verify the climb was actually difficult.

“Frank and Andy Schleck kept getting the hump with me because they've never seen me in that position,” he said. “I think they thought 'Would you just piss off, get out of here and let us get on with our job'.”

Asked about his prospects for the rest of the race, he replied: “The more you think about it harder it becomes, and then you get to third week and you’re a bit of a milkshake. But at the end of the day, it’s only the Tourde France.”

“A bit of a milkshake”, “Only the Tour de France” – are we on our own here or is there nothing about this rider not to love? Okay, there is one thing. Wiggins is a Brit, which, especially with the Ashes on, does present a certain patriotic challenge for the average Australian lounge room.

Happily, a solution is at hand. Wiggins is the son of six-day racer Gary Wiggins, who it turns out hailed from Yallourn, gateway to Gippsland and mecca for Victorian power station tourism.

Aussie Brad, anyone?

There’s no ‘I’ in Astana – a lesson in team spirit and staying on message.

"[The] relationship [between the Texan and me] is correct and normal." – Alberto Contador, June 5

“The leader is Alberto.” – Johan Bruyneel, June 31

"[Who is leader] is just so hard to say." – Lance Armstrong, July 5

“[Attacking against team instructions] is good for the team.” – Contador, July 10

“I didn't expect him to go by the plan. It's no surprise.” – Armstrong, July 10

“The honest truth? There’s a little tension at the dinner table.” – Armstrong, July 12

"I don't feel any tension in the team.” – Contador, July 13

"We’ve heard the [Astana] rumours but we don’t really know what's going on. Are Peter and Jordan really separated? Is the Big Brother house real? We only know what people tell us.” – Bradley Wiggins, July 11

Dispatches from the twit frontier.

As radios crackle into life once more following the world’s most boring stage, @LeviLeipheimer and @stevendejongh lead us to suspect there is a party line in the peloton.

@wegelius found the whole affair delightful, and can’t wait to do it all again on stage 13.

What is the collective noun for tour directors? A collusion?

Jesus fails to turn up in Issoudun, forcing @mickrogers to share his five loaves with the rest of Columbia-HTC. Judging by his impish grin, the two fishes were pocketed earlier by Cav.

Totally ignoring the Broom Wagon’s affection, @bradwiggins worries he is losing friends in the media.

@taylorphinney appears to be plotting unspeakable violence against puffins. Who will save the toucans of the Arctic?

TourTube.

Oh god. Patch Adams.

The Broom Wagon was compiled by Matthew Price.