Compulsory helmets perhaps comes close, in terms of a debate that may start with civil intentions but invariably ends in ice cream forks being hurled across the dining room, ironically further advancing the case for compulsory helmets.

Another contender you may remember from a previous episode starring Shane Warne is the question of whether cyclists ought to pay registration.

Each of these issues is distinguished by the typically (though not universally) fixed views held by either side. Editors, but not comment moderators, love them, as they generate long comment threads fizzing with the pops and kabooms of people sniping at each other from entrenched positions.

Rupert Guinness argues here that for the good of our sport the Armstrong case is a boil that needs to be ... and The Broom Wagon apologises in advance for the wounds inflicted on this pun ... lanced.

For those interested in the case and wishing to avoid teary recriminations and prong marks in the furniture, a good place to kick off discussion is with what is actually being alleged, and against whom.

The letter sent by USADA to Armstrong and five other individuals, including Radioshack-Nissan team manager Johan Bruyneel, has been obtained by The Wall Street Journal and can be read online here.

It's only 15 pages and is worth reading. And if not for the depth and volume of the case being brought by USADA, for the throwaway details. Testosterone, USADA alleges, was known on the US Postal and Discovery Channel teams as 'oil'. The endurance-booster EPO was allegedly known as E, Po, Edgar and, brilliantly, Edgar Allen Poe, raising the possibility that at least one wide-eyed youngster approached a team bus expecting an afternoon of gothic poetry and found something quite different.

Then there are the responses by the concerned parties.

Armstrong, on learning of the action against him, accused USADA of being motivated by spite and malice (coincidentally, the name of The Broom Wagon's lawyers). You can read his full response on his website here.

And USADA posted its own statement, arguing that it "only initiates matters supported by the evidence" and emphasising its "duty on behalf of clean athletes and those that value the integrity of sport ... to fairly and thoroughly evaluate all the evidence available and when there is credible evidence of doping, take action under the established rules". You can read USADA's statement here.

After that, the Internet being nothing if not a forum for expression, it is more or less a free for all. Those wishing to take the route of ice cream forks at dawn can assume their positions (column A: 'clean sport matters'; column B: 'has never failed a test', 'leave the guy alone', 'witch hunt', 'why should I care?' etc). And those of a non-confrontational bent can fall back on the International Cycling Union's approach (the UCI has not been involved and will not be commenting).

The week in
... wholefoods
Peter Sagan is quietly (unless you count the Elvis hair and wheelies) accumulating a staggering number of victories. L'Equipe reported during the week that Sagan, at 22, now has 33 career wins to his name, while at the same age, Laurent Jalabert had one, Sean Kelly two and Philippe Gilbert five.

The casual fan might assume Sagan is also amassing a glittering wealth of prizes, and would be right.

Liquigas-Cannondale team-mate Ted King has itemised the gift bag Sagan received for winning Monday's Stage 3 of the Tour de Suisse.

It included: a wheel of garlic cheese, apples, radishes, three bottles of wine, celery, a slab of bacon, a bottle of apple syrup, a box of organic sugar, half a gallon of honey, three sausages and a book.

Photo evidence is here.

... questions
Graeme Obree, former world hour record holder on a bike he built using old washing machine parts, is now building a machine he hopes will break the human-powered land speed record. He starts by asking himself: What would an alien do?

... accessorising
Velo's decision to include Andy Schleck in its front cover cartoon 'the Superheroes of July' now appears a touch premature. At least the French magazine has pretty much nailed it with the other three superheroes. Vincenzo Nibali has his underpants on the outside, as all good superheroes do. Cadel Evans rocks a Southern Cross skinsuit and a stripy towel around his waist, evidently in the expectation he will win this year's Tour by such a huge margin he will have time for sunbathing. And Bradley Wiggins has teamed his mum's belt with shin-pads, Dracula's cape and, unless The Broom Wagon is mistaken, a distinctly worried expression.

Dispatches from the Twitterverse

I wonder if race organizers do one of those mad evil laughs like on the cartoons when they find a cat 1 climb to send us up from km 0?

— Simon Gerrans (@simongerrans) June 9, 2012

Inspired by Spain and my love of all things sweet I've made it my life goal to open a dessert tapas bar. Interested investors please PM me.

— Chloe Hosking (@chloe_hosking) June 11, 2012

Classic YouTube
Fans of Danny Macaskill's videos will appreciate the London 2012 Olympic Games organisers' courage in letting Macaskill carry the Olympic torch for last Friday's leg in Edinburgh. Macaskill sensibly limits himself to only two wheelies.