Celebrity

Woody Allen clone Lee Simon (as realised by Kenneth Branagh) is a man who went to his high school reunion when he was forty and got scared that somehow he was missing out on life. Off with the wife Robin (Judy Davis) who tries a religious retreat and then contemplates plastic surgery with a celebrity doctor, which is where she meets TV producer Tony (Joe Mantegna). Meanwhile Lee is after anything nubile that crosses his path. It's pathetic really.

What is Woody Allen doing with this film? Is it the highest form of narcissism that Kenneth Branagh plays Lee exactly like Allen, even down to the stuttering. Or is it the highest form of criticism?

There is a deep misanthropic cynicism at the heart of Celebrity which leaves a sour taste in the mouth. One could perhaps forgive it that if it were extraordinarily witty or insightful. But it's neither. The jokes are obvious, and mostly unfunny. They're tired. And by the end I just couldn't bear to hear words spewing out of Lee's mouth any more. I'd had enough.

This is the work of an embittered man and it's no surprise that the best apartment in the film is owned by a working girl played by Bebe Neuwirth. Celebrity has an all star cast and Leonardo DiCaprio and Winona Ryder are particularly good. It's well directed, especially the choreography of the crowd scenes, but it's what's in the director's head these days that's a turnoff.