He’s so over the top that if cycling did not have Riccardo Ricco it would have to invent him.
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7 Apr 2015 - 11:32 PM  UPDATED 13 Apr 2015 - 3:38 PM

Ricco is certifiably nuts, entertainly so as evidenced by his latest media round to spruik his freshly penned biography, 'A Funeral in Yellow - the Confessions of the Cobra'.

Cyclingnews has excerpted a good slice of the vocal stylings of Ricco from Tuttobici, focusing on the UCI's Reform Commission, but the quote that caught my eye was this:

"I didn't steal anything, in doping terms I was the village cobbler compared to the big multi-national brands," he said.

"I did what everyone else did and was perhaps in an artisan way. There were riders like Armstrong who had a staff of scientists, while people like me did what we could."

Yep, the Cobra is now a cobbler, rewriting history as a Artisanal, free range, organic slow food doper. A modern day Geppetto, humbly plying his trade from a local Agriturismo where all the pharma on offer is produced by local villagers not named Ferrari.

"I think what's happened has made me grow up. When I raced I was at full bore and hated by the peloton because I was stronger than they were and I was a real idiot," he continued.

"I wouldn't make the same mistakes that I made. I wouldn't dope, or I'd at least do it differently."

Mad as a cut snake. Right for all the wrong reasons.

Still, Ricco is here, alive. He almost was the second coming of Marco Pantani. We should be grateful that he's not.

Shine on you crazy diamond.