• Yoann Offredo ( (Getty) (Velo)Source: Velo
Woah! Stage 7 of the 2018 Tour de France was a long one. It was so long....we made a lighthearted listicle.
Cycling Central

14 Jul 2018 - 11:04 AM  UPDATED 14 Jul 2018 - 12:02 PM

Stage 7 was a 'transition' stage - the ones race organisers force the peloton to ride so we can all get from the regions around the grand depart to other parts of France rather than ride around in just one corner of it. 

When faced with the question, "so why these long stages?", race organisers ASO often cite logistics - i.e. they don't want to force teams to drive hours to get to the other parts of France, so they make them ride them instead. And another good reason - grand depart regions plus other start and finish towns - who all bid for the privilege - generate lucrative revenue for race organisers. 

Long, 200+ kilometre stages used to be a regular feature of the Tour. But earlier live broadcasts were not. 

So there's got to be a better way! 

Until one is offered by the ASO, let's keep it lighthearted with a listicle: 

Stage 7 was so long, quite a number of things happened: 

1. Robbie McEwen had several birthdays 

2. The environment repaired itself 

Plastic started to break down, Sky put pictures of oil drills on their jersey, ditching the orca as the oceans are now clean. 

3. Brexit finally happened, Trump rules the UK

Trump's takeover of the UK led to a warming of his relations with Europe, including this Tour inspired roadside art:

4. We finished those James Joyce novels we never got around to

And here's another brilliant Irishman:

5. We yearned for pre 2003 when all we got was a daily highlights package presented by Tomo 

6. #TrollDJ became a little obscure 

Sure, if you're a 24 fan you'd know this one straight away, but outside of that, who knew there was an actual title soundtrack that wasn't a clock counting down

On these kind of stages TrollDJ shines, here's the compilation from stage 7:

7. Even lone breakaway Yoann Offredo didn't want to be out there  

Dying from boredom out there on his own, he desparately pleaded with his team car to be allowed back to the bunch. But to no avail.


8. We fell asleep at the live streaming wheel   

9. The #couchpeloton started another funny hashtag #thisstageissolong

Proving our fans can do it better than us, they started another funny hashtag: