Hello, friends - it’s so good to see you again! I’ve had a busy few weeks - those sticks aren’t going to collect themselves - but in case you think that every day is full of the puppyish things I talked about last week, I decided I have to explain what life is like for a hardworking farm dog. Supervising my human is HARD WORK. Run alongside me as we go through a typical day on the farm.
6am: Hooray! It’s morning! Another day is here! Every morning is the best! Wake up, world! I have never been so excited (except for yesterday morning)!
6.01am: Paul has let me outside; he doesn’t look as happy as me about the morning for some reason. Time to do my business. Now it’s time to say hello to the farm. Hello backyard. Hello front yard! Hello chickens. Hello cow. Hello pigs.
8am: BREAKFAST TIME. Paul is having eggs on sourdough which means I am also having eggs on sourdough. Sometimes he forgets that his meal is also my meal, but that’s alright - I remind him by subtly wriggling my entire body around his legs in the kitchen. Wiggle wiggle - ah, there’s a nice crusty piece of bread! Thanks, Paul. Now it’s gone. Wiggle wiggle. I love breakfast.
9am-12pm: Most mornings I spend time exploring, sniffing and surveying my property. Sometimes magpies get confused and think they are allowed in so I bark bark bark until they leave. They usually come back, so then I bark bark bark. I’m a great guard dog.
12pm: Paul has left in his car. IS HE EVER COMING BACK? WHERE HAS HE GONE? WAS THAT THE LAST TIME I WILL EVER SEE HIS FACE? I MISS HIM SO MUCH - oh wait never mind. He’s home.
2pm: Gardening time! Paul came back with some funny-looking green things that he is putting in the soil for some reason. He keeps doing this. I don’t question the weird things humans do, it’s not polite to judge animals just because they aren’t as smart as dogs. I help a lot by watching him do things. The sun is so warm on my face. I might just lie down and stretch my legs. I love the sun. I can still supervise him… from … here.
4pm: What happened? I fell asleep. I was having very stressful dreams about birds. Time to do another lap of the farm and make sure everything is just where I left it.
6.30pm: DINNER TIME! We’re having rabbits - yum. Tonight’s dinner is the most delicious thing I’ve eaten since breakfast. I licked my bowl clean and Paul gave me a nice pat on the head. He’s so proud of me.
8pm: It’s cold tonight so there’s a fire going. It’s just like the sun except a bit more scary, so I lie down next to it on the perfect spot (sometimes you have to turn around in circles to find the perfect sitting place). Oh hang on, Paul’s feet are in the road but that’s okay, I’ll just move right in here and let him know it would be much better if he just … oh yes, that’s much better, thanks Paul. What a perfect day… I hope tomorrow is just as great.
Digger thanks Deirdre Fidge for helping to get his thoughts online. It’s hard to type with paws.