• Going Deep with David Rees (SBS)Source: SBS
Our writer learns that this show should be required viewing for anyone who does things and/or stuff.
Frank Ponderosa

1 Jul 2016 - 6:38 PM  UPDATED 1 Jul 2016 - 6:39 PM

Going Deep with David Rees is an important show. In fact, it should be required viewing for anyone who does things and/or stuff. Why? Because Mr Rees not only does things and/or stuff right, he teaches us how to stop doing them wrong.

I used to do everything wrong as my family and friends can attest. However, since Going Deep my life is happier, I sleep better, shower more efficiently, and I have had zero dog bites so far this year.

Here's how each episode of season two of Going Deep has drastically improved my life:


1. “How to Pet a Dog”

First of all, petting a dog is not for everyone. I have never been a dog person, so when a friend asked me to dog sit, I thought I had to wear a special “animal petting glove”. Not necessary according to the wisdom of Mr Rees. A friendly hand and a confident stroke is all you need. I pet-sat my friend’s dog like a pro, and by the end of my visit that Labrador was eating fettuccine Alfredo and chocolate lava cake right out of my hands.

Watch the episode:


2. “How to Eavesdrop”

I don’t know about you, but I suspect most people are speaking ill of me. Sometimes I can actually hear them, though I am told those voices are not real. However, when you’re, let’s say at a restaurant and want to eavesdrop on the juicy conversation at the table next to yours, there are a couple of ways to do this. The old me would go with the “cupping your hands over your ears to make a satellite” technique. Thanks to Mr Rees, I now use custom made hearing aids or the ever-reliable glass on the door for when they go into the stall in the restroom. 

Watch the episode:


3. “How to Get Punched”

I have been punched several times in my life. A few hits led to short term memory loss, and one led to a very lucrative lawsuit against the actor who plays Colonel Sanders in the KFC commercials.

I never used to think about how to deflect punches to protect my organs. I would just throw myself to the ground and cover myself with vomit. Now that M. Rees has shown me how to take a punch, I welcome those punches. 

Watch the episode:


4. “How to Bounce a Ball”

You might think you know how to bounce a ball, but do you know how to bounce a ball like a gentleman (or a lady)? If you’re not sure then chances are you don’t and that makes you a menace. Manipulating a ball’s bounce is a science. Before Mr Rees showed me how reckless I was being, I would lay in bed bouncing tennis balls off my wall without a care. Today, I bounce tennis balls and yell things like “velocity” and “coefficient of restitution” because I keep my sh@t real.

Watch the episode:


5. “How to Sign Your Name”

Signatures: The original selfies. Mr Rees makes a very valid point in this episode. America is in a “signature crisis”. Penmanship has been replaced by robots and technology. My chicken scratch signature was not exempt. I was so humiliated by it that I hired a consultant to make my writing appear less ape-like. Today, thanks to what I have learned I have the signature of an educated business man who makes a good wage and does not throw his faeces at haters. 

Watch the episode:


6. “How to Take a Nap”

For some people twenty minutes is enough. For me four and a half hours is plenty. Fact: Napping makes you more productive. Think about it. There’s a reason why rich people have fancy sofas. Hint: For napping. 

Watch the episode:


7. “How to Make Toast”

Many would have you believe that the key to making good toast is in the type of electricity you use in your home, but it’s not. It’s not the toaster, not the bread; it’s not even the fork you use to pull it out. It’s the person who makes it. That’s why mum’s cooking is always the best. Because it reminds us of home. Of the good times. So when someone asks me if there exists a perfect slice of toast, I just say, "Why don't you ask your mother?"

Watch the episode:


8. “How to Do the Dishes”

Luckily I don’t wash my dishes. I don’t even use dishes. I eat straight from the microwaveable bowl, usually over the sink with the garbage disposal running in case I drop a pork knuckle. But now that Mr Rees has shown me how to wash even the grimiest of dishes using very little water, I'm going shopping for plates! And gravy boats!

Watch the episode:


DISCLAIMER: Frank Ponderosa is not a real person. He's made up. And yet, his passion for SBS programming is as real and alive as you or me. 

Watch the entire second season of Going Deep With David Rees on SBS On Demand.

More from Frank Ponderosa
5 things I learnt from watching Adam Ruins Everything: Restaurants
You'll never look at eating out the same way again.
Mad Men will never end for me... even when it does
One extremely passionate fan of the show takes us on a journey through his deep obsession with the drama.
10 ways having sex on a webcam made me a better person
How one man’s journey to save his family led him to start "doing it” on the Internet.