While travelogue series Food, Booze and Tattoos introduces us to some genuinely hip people, but for some celebrities a hip tattoo can be a welcome shortcut to credibility.
Jeremy Cassar

21 Oct 2016 - 3:57 PM  UPDATED 27 Oct 2016 - 10:32 AM

Knowing that an article like this may draw multiple audiences, writer Jeremy Cassar has crafted two introductions to this piece. Please choose your cultural designation as you commence the article.

Introduction for the non-hipster:

SBS series Food Booze and Tattoos, is only hipster on the surface. It may be hosted by some kind of model-slash-athlete who dresses in the hipster uniform, but the diverse cultural exploration he engages in makes this an infotainment Trojan horse..

Introduction for the hipster:

Hey clan. Sweet doco, like, nothing like The Jinx. Kinda legit. But more, like, relatable.  Solid dude runs the whole event — f****** rad beard and like… one of those dudes that’d be heaps chill and tell f*****-up stories and probably likes a good crafty paddle with the boys and girls. Heaps knowledgeable, and it’s the kinda content we dig, you know. Called Food, Booze and Tattoos.

While the show isn't celebrity-driven, it did get us thinking about hipster celebrity tattoos - the shameful and the even more shameful. 

Lena Dunham’s Rear Real Estate

Though modern hipsterism pre-dated Lena Dunham’s ascendancy to near-top of the zeitgeist, the two ramshackle houses on either side of Lena’s spine aesthetically resemble something out of Frankie Magazine, or something you might find sketched and photocopied, then framed, and sold for sixty bucks at Sydney’s Paddington Markets.

Jared Leto’s fashionable forearms

In alchemy, the four elements are represented by symbols, all variations on the triangle. Not a fan of earth, fire or water, Leto has a pair of symbols on the backs of his forearms, one that means ‘air’, and the other that means ‘air’. 

Why? For no clear reason other than it’s the symbol of his favourite band—30 Seconds From Mars, and how ‘ironic’ is it to ink your body with promotional material for your next gig.

Diablo Cody’s nostalgia

Without a doubt, the hippest screenwriter to ever have worked as a stripper, the prolific Cody exploded onto the scene with Juno and since then gave us The United States of Tara, Young Adult and next year’s Jason Reitman-directed/Charlize Theron-lead Tully.

Such an outstanding oeuvre for such a young writer doesn’t excuse the vintage pin-up model that is permanently inked into her arm. Choosing a vintage image is all good and well, but what’s wrong with today’s pin-up models?

Sorry, Diablo, but vintage pin-up models include the word vintage and are also known as retro. Whatever your intentions, your ink (and well, your tendency to write dialogue that’s both wordy and en vogue), make you a hipster, whether you like it or not.

Bella Thorne’s tickler

I’d only ever heard of Bella Thorne by name, but apparently she’s on her way to ‘big deal’ territory, so I’m sure some of you are well acquainted with her material.

Either way, Thorne has riffed on a brief hipster trend: the permanent fingerstache, replacing the ingenious inked moustache you can hold up to your upper lip to make it kinda-but-not look like a real one, with cat whiskers.

Kirsten Stewart’s meta tattoo

On Stewart’s arm reads “One more time with feeling”, a phrase inked in capital letters by some renowned French tattooist.

Known as one of the blandest actresses around, which can actually work to her advantage in certain roles (see Welcome To The Rileys for proof), it’s rather sad that Stewart has marked her arm with a criticism that’s plagued her career, but also kind of “ironic” and a little bit meta.

Stewart told Jimmy Fallon (and millions of people) that the tattoo also doubles up as a philosophy towards life, so who are we to judge?

So hipster, though.

SBS and chill with Food, Booze and Tattoos on SBS2 at 7:05pm Saturday nights. Catch up on earlier episodes on SBS On Demand:

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