We’ve all been there… the longings of forbidden love. Whether it’s a crush on a cute teacher when you’re 13 or the unrequited heartache of pining for the boy next door.
Sometimes though, we fall in love with people we know we shouldn’t… the rebel, the bad guy, the one who is just a little bit dangerous, the one we know will break our hearts.
Watching SAS: Who Dares Wins is a little like falling in love with the bad boy over and over again. After all, this is a show about misfits: You know going into it that they’re messed up. You know they’re probably going to give you nothing but trouble. You know- deep down- it’ll never work. And yet, your poor hopeful heart won’t give up. As the commanders say, it’s about separating the good misfits from the bad. Here are eight bad boys of SAS who just might be redeemable… and if not, at least they’re hot.
Commander Ant Middleton
Chief instructor and chief badass, Commander Ant is dark, buff and bearded. He was also a sniper in the SAS for four years so you know when Ant shoots, he doesn’t miss. You can only assume that same marksmanship would translate to the bedroom.
Commander Mark “Billy” Billingham
Billy describes being in the SAS as “putting a house on your back, getting in a sauna, walking up and down the steps of the sauna and then getting someone to smash you in the face with a load of sticks.”
Okay. So he’s not exactly a poet. But he’s built like steel and he was Angelina Jolie’s bodyguard. If he’s good enough for Ange, he’s definitely good enough for you.
SAS recruit Geoff
Geoff is the guy your parents worried about. Handsome, rugged, emotional and with an extremely short fuse. He was in prison at 17 for selling drugs and later got deported from Australia… but he’s got himself together. Sure, he’s a bit untidy in barracks but he looks after his mates and he’s working hard as a satellite installer and is committed to putting his daughter through university. There’s a heart of gold under those fatigues.
SAS recruit Keith
There’s only one thing you need to know about Keith: he loves discipline. He even says straight off the bat he’s here because he loves people yelling at him and telling him what to do. Just think how that might translate to a relationship… I’m not even talking in a kinky sense: think of all you’d get done around the house.
“Keith! Unpack that dishwasher!”
“Ma’am Yes, Ma’am!”
“Keith! Take out the damn garbage!”
“Ma’am Yes Ma’am”
SAS recruit Moses
You just know Moses is a sensitive soul, right from the moment he freaks out jumping off that bridge in the first episode. I mean, sure, he’s been to prison but he didn’t do anything violent. Yes, he was involved in a bank robbery but c’mon: he only drove the getaway car, he didn’t kill anyone. Anyway, he’s changed. He’s a personal trainer. He doesn’t take his anger out on anyone anymore: he sweats it out instead. And he’s not afraid to show fear: unlike the other recruits who pretend they’re not scared abseiling out of a freakin helicopter, Moses is no BS: He tells us he’s bricking it and frankly, we get it. We’d be bricking it too.
SAS recruit Stephen
26-year-old bricklayer Stephen admits he’s got problems. He struggles with addiction. Gambling, drinking, you name it: Stephen is into it. And he struggles to control his aggression. And there’s a prison stint in there somewhere… Okay. So you’ve definitely got your work cut out for you with Stephen. But that doesn’t mean he’s a lost cause. He’s not unfixable.
SAS recruit Mick
35-year-old Mick is a comedian from Down Under. No, really. If that conjures up hilarious images of Pete Helliar or Josh Thomas trying to tackle the SAS course, then you’re not far off. But Mick has demons of his own: his life growing up in a pub saw him spend his teens and twenties spiralling into alcohol addiction, drugs and gambling. But he’s desperate to turn his life around: he wants to make his family proud. That’s the kind of good misfit we can all fall in love with.
SAS recruit Efrem
Efrem isn’t your average bad boy. For starters, in his interviews he dons a *particularly* special sweater vest of the type worn by Chandler Bing in the mid ‘90’s. But Efrem is a dark horse. Committed, determined, quiet, charming… and in his mid 40’s which is borderline elderly when it comes to the SAS. But Efrem, it turns out, has “some f**king balls”, as Commando Ant says, when he reveals his real motivation for putting his ancient (tho let’s face it, still pretty damn fine) body through this torture: he’s trying to connect with his son who was recently killed serving in Afghanistan. The man has heart, guts, soul and he’s a devoted father. Stay back, ladies: he may be aged, but this one is mine.
Watch season 2 of SAS: Who Dares Wins at SBS On Demand.
You can stream the first episode right here: