How an affair can make a couple stronger, or push them apart

0:00

Infidelity can have long-lasting impacts on everyone involved. These two couples reveal what happened in the aftermath of an affair.

Preview above: Insight takes a look at why people have affairs, and explores what happens in the aftermath. Affairs, Tuesday July 14 at 8:30pm.

It was the little details that first made Amanda suspicious something was going on between her husband, Regan, and her new friend.

“She would end up telling me more about my husband’s day than I knew about … I hadn’t even had a chance to talk to him, and she’s telling me complicated details of his day-to-day,” she says.

After finding messages on his phone and confronting Regan, her fears were confirmed: her husband had been having an affair.

While Regan admits the infidelity shouldn’t have happened, he explains he was feeling neglected in his relationship at the time.

“I just felt seen by somebody, and I wasn’t feeling that with my wife,” he explains to Insight guest host Marc Fennell.

I’m blaming myself, I’ve hurt people.

Mikko was also married when he met fellow student, Irish, at university. Irish had no interest in pursuing a relationship once she found out about Mikko’s wife, but the attraction between them grew and their relationship did eventually become physical.

While Mikko told his wife what had happened, and chose to work on his marriage, Irish decided to move overseas.

“I’m blaming myself, I’ve hurt people,” she tells Marc. “I thought to banish myself … will be the best thing to do.”

But even living on different continents, Mikko and Irish couldn't stop thinking about each other, and when they met up again two years later they found the connection was still there.

For some couples – like Amanda and Regan – an affair can be the catalyst to repair a troubled connection. Other times, it can spell the end of a relationship and even the start of a new one, like it did for Mikko and Irish.

On this Insight episode, we hear about the fallout from affairs – from those who strayed in their relationships, to those who were betrayed – to ask: what are the lasting impacts of infidelity?

Source SBS Insight