Unless you have been living under a rock, you might have noticed that relationships between the police and mob are not exactly great...
It’s hard to pinpoint the exact moment the relationship got bad. It could have been when - because there was no military conquest - the police acted on the state’s behalf, aiding in our dispossession. Or those times they helped the state take our children, leaving trauma in their wake. Or it might just be that they won’t stop (can’t stop) killing us.
Sure, it could be racism, brutality and the criminalisation of black people or it might just be really bad marketing by the police.
Whatever is it, as a proud Aboriginal woman, I am here to help the police with their image problem (thank me later!). For your consideration, a five point reconciliation action plan.
Aboriginal flag police shirts
I know WA police had tried their best to foster positive relationships with their new Aboriginal-themed shirts, but arguably it didn't go far enough. A few pretty dots on a shirt only disguises blood splatter. I’m calling for a straight up flag t-shirt. It’ll make you feel plenty safe when you are getting arrested, and during rallies, you won't know who is a protester and who is police, which is reconciliation in action.
More native food
I mean, when hasn’t some lilly pilly jam brought people together? What can’t be solved over some lemon myrtle tea? At the very least, a cultural cuppa, it would make a tasty additions to your time in the watch house, which will be a welcome distraction from the fact you are being denied legal representation.
Learn more language
Australia has the highest language extinction rate in the world. Here, I say kill two birds with one stone and teach those who “protect” and “serve” some lingo. That way when they call you an epithet you’ll understand them better. How deadly!
Do a rap video together
The kids love the hippity-hoppity. They love to get down to those funky beats. Dre knows it. Kendrick knows it. Sure so much hip hop was spawned out of distrust of and mistreatment from the police, NWA gave us a song called, “Fuck tha police,” and Public Enemy gave us, “911 is a joke,” KRS One gave us, “Sound of the Police,” but that’s nothing a little appropriation can’t fix. A simple workshop at the PCYC and a go pro later...
Black people be nicer to the police
All of the above solutions put the onus on the police. But relationships are a two-way street, baby. As the old saying goes, “you catch more flies with honey.” Have black people just tried being nicer to the police?
*This is content is satire. Like the article? Follow the author @NayukaGorrie