Joe Kwon remembers being a young man in trouble.
On a Thursday afternoon the Sydney teen would start drinking and taking drugs and on Saturday he would find himself in a hotel in Queensland’s Surfers Paradise with no idea how he got there.
“I always getting off my head,” Kwon, 34, founder of CONFIT, a not-for-profit gym and mentoring program for youth and formerly incarcerated people told SBS Voices.
“I was 20-year-old kid with all this money, living a high life and I had a bit of a chip on my shoulder.”
Joe Kwon. Source: Supplied
Kwon grew up in south-western Sydney in the 1990s. He was raised by a single mum, a Korean international student studying at the Sydney Conservatorium of Music. But she struggled with English and putting food on the table. In one year the pair moved 12 times. Kwon often got expelled. Eventually life on the streets offered a bigger pull than school.
“I didn’t feel accepted at school because I was disruptive, and I was a very angry kid. Why would I stay in a place where I didn’t feel accepted? I was more accepted and respected on the streets. I decided I’m making much more money on the streets anyway,” he said.
“I only joined a gang because I was supported and I felt I belonged to them. Crime was just the by-factor of being in that gang. I just wanted to be around the support of the brotherhood. And a lot of kids mistake (gangs for support) as well."
Eventually it came crashing down when Kwon, aged 21, was arrested for supplying quantities of MDMA and sentenced to 13 years in prison in 2009.
Joe mentoring a Life on the Outside participant. Source: Supplied
Prison was a wake-up call. One of his cell mates was an unhappy millionaire in for tax fraud. At the time, Kwon was restless and on the chase for more – more money, more bling, and more respect. “I was thinking if you had that much money wouldn’t you be happy? So, if you’re not happy with a dollar, you’re not going to be happy with a million dollars. I teach the boys, even if you’re in here there’s a lot of things to be grateful for.”
In one prison, Kwon remembers blowing frost from his mouth; the walls were sticky, and it was bitterly cold and notoriously violent. He observed that a group of prisoners dedicated to fitness using makeshift gyms, seemed to be the ones surviving best inside. Joining them was a decision that would change Kwon’s life.
“Fitness was a really a great kind of escapism tool for me to stay positive, because, my body was incarcerated, but when I was training, my mind was free.
Training grounded him when he was tempted to give up: “On social media, you are always comparing yourself with others. In prison I was doing that as well. I would get on the phone with a lot of my friends and the guys were going on holidays and getting new jobs. They were moving forward in life. I was stuck in jail. Every time I talked to them and I compared myself with them, it was becoming toxic to my soul. I was like, you know what? I will do the best that I can in my personal every day moments and not compare myself to others.
“Having really good people around you made me forget I was in a bad place. That's with any situation, whether you're in hell here or outside, it doesn't matter. If you're living high, the five star life, but you don't have the right people around you, you're gonna be in a negative mindset.
Kwon remembers it wasn’t easy when he was released on parole in 2017, after serving nine years. He was confused by technology: “The first time I saw a smartphone I was like, where are the buttons on this? How do I make the call?” he laughs.
Joe mentoring a Life on the Outside participant. Source: Supplied
“I didn't even understand the concept of Instagram. Why would you put photos of yourself up for everyone to look at? That's just asking the police to investigate, you know?”
Kwon says there is a shame cloud and prejudice that can trail the formerly incarcerated making it hard to access housing and jobs: “Individuals coming outta prison need to get that support and opportunity. There’s not enough support out there and they unfortunately can spiral back into the system.”
The non-judgmental help he received from people he did not even know gave him the confidence to thrive. Kwon went on to study a commerce degree at the University of New South Wales, leading him to create CONFIT as part of his MBA social enterprise program. “The young people in juvie [juvenile detention] today have this thing called the G code. It's a code of silence. It's a code saying your word is your bond.
“I try and teach them a new G code: gratitude, goal setting and being grounded. It's always about moving forward even when inside prison. Goal setting is also known as hope, having hope in something, and creating a world around that. The last one is, being grounded in the moment: just do the best that you can in every moment because you don't know if tomorrow's going to come.
For the young kids and formerly incarcerated Kwon mentors, creating positive support systems was key.
“Once they come outta prison, they start to realise, you know, this whole crime thing is really rubbish. It really doesn't get you anywhere. That's what we're trying to do with CONFIT, to build that same gang mentality but in a good way.”
The three-part documentary series Life on the Outside | New episodes Wednesday 8:30pm on SBS or Stream Free on SBS On Demand.
If you or someone you know is experiencing family violence or sexual assault phone 1800RESPECT/1800 737 732 or visit 1800respect.org.au. For counselling, advice and support for men who have anger, relationship or parenting issues, call the Men’s Referral Service on 1300 766 491 or visit ntv.org.au.
For 24/7 crisis support, call Lifeline on 13 11 14.
