Musician, dancer, and former Disney star Alyson Stoner has come out as queer, penning a heartfelt personal essay for Teen Vogue about the first time she fell in love with a woman.
“I texted my mother and best friend, saying, 'I met a woman today, I’m not sure who she is or what I’m feeling, but I think she’s going to be in my life for a very long time,'” Stoner writes.
She continues: “Our bond didn’t feel quite sisterly or platonic. Flashes of her smile progressed to flashes of her wavy hair followed by the curve of her hips through her straight-leg pants. I realised I had never fantasised about a guy this way, nor really ever felt comfortable dating guys.”
“Come to think of it, I stared at women’s bodies more than anything,” she adds.
Stoner, who has had roles in films including Cheaper by the Dozen and appeared in the music video for Missy Elliott's "Work It", struggled with the realisation that she was attracted to women, and eventually went to conversion therapy, admitting that her “worldview neither supported nor accepted same-sex relationships”.
“I prayed in turmoil nightly, begging to be healed from these desires. Certain pastors and community members tried to reverse and eliminate my attraction to her,” she writes.
“I pursued physical relationships with men to convince myself that my love for her was just a spiritual battle attacking my character and discernment. I pored over texts, contemporary and ancient, seeking truth and answers from professors, scientists, church leaders, friends, and family.”
But everything changed when Stoner and the woman first shared a kiss.
“OK, we were in a relationship. I fell in love with a woman,” she shares.
Eventually coming to terms with her sexuality, Stoner tells readers that they're not alone in their confusion.
“I, Alyson, am attracted to men, women, and people who identify in other ways. I can love people of every gender identity and expression,” she writes.
“If you’re questioning or struggling with your sexuality, gender identity, or anything else, know that I and so many who’ve gone before us are with you."
She concludes: “Whatever your identity, you are lovable and wonderful and enough.”
