How has the legalisation of same-sex marriage affected LGBTQ of Korean background?
26 year-old gay man Sangwoo Lee* came to Australia five years ago on a working holiday visa.
Lee, who now permanently resides in Australia, says he was happy to witness the same-sex marriage bill pass through parliament in 2017.
"I came to Australia because I felt like I had a life with limits in my homeland Korea," he tells SBS Korean. "So I have been supporting the Australian gay marriage act from the beginning and I was so glad to see it eventually passed."
Lee used to believe that the legalisation of same-sex marriage was not so important, because for him the more critical thing was the fact two people truly love each other. However, the more hate crimes against gay people that occur, the more he believes a legal safety net is necessary.
Lee’s life has not been changed since the gay marriage act came into effect last December. However, he believes that his potential future has been transformed.
Now he can have the same rights as other straight people and can get married whenever he wants. This has made him excited about his new future.
"Like other straight couples we will have the same benefits," he says. "That’s just great.I definitely want to get married one day."
"I definitely want to get married one day."
David Han is another gay man who has closely followed the legalisation of same sex-marriage. The 23-year old says his future options became widened as a result of legalisation.
"I have a partner who’s an Australian," Han tells SBS Korean. "Before the legalisation passed, I thought what if one day we love each other so much and eventually want to tie the knot?"
"A marriage wasn’t an option possibly given to us but now we have a right of choice."
"No one ever has looked us strangely and it was just so natural not like in Korea."
Han came out as gay even when he lived in Korea, but says decided that it would be in Australia, where he was studying, that he would like to settle down.
He says that’s because how people looked at him was different here in Australia.
“As my partner is an Australian, we go to see a doctor together and we attend events together as a couple," says Han." I was introduced by others as his partner and introduce him as my partner either."
"No one ever has looked us strangely and it was just so natural not like in Korea."
"Not many LGBTQs are interested in the same-sex marriage issue in the Korean community in Australia"
Many Korean LGBTQ people report that it is much more comfortable to live in Australia than Korea as there is more understanding about the homosexuality issue.
Lee and Han may be unusual within the Australian Korean community with their interest in the change of legislation. Anecdotally, SBS Korean has heard from some members of the Korean community here that few LGBTQ people of Korean background have closely followed the same-sex marriage campaign.
Lee says actually, quite a lot of gay people around him didn’t really care about it. "In fact, most of them are not interested in it," he says.
"Temporary visitors like people on working holiday visas and student visas will need to go back to Korea eventually so the legalisation of gay marriage will not provide any benefits to them so they are not interested in it."
Korean community in Australia as conservative as in Korea
There has been huge progress in Australia for the past year in regards to LGBTQ issues. Unfortunately, this change hasn’t necessarily been reflected in the Korean community in Australia.
Lee says the Korean community in Australia is just like his homeland Korea. “It is Korean culture that doesn’t accept the homosexuality so it is very uncomfortable to come out to people with Korean background."
"It is Korean culture that doesn’t accept the homosexuality so it is very uncomfortable to come out to people with Korean background."
Han concurs with Lee, saying he doesn’t really want to be active in the Korean community and try to have closer relationships with other Koreans.
"Young people are aware of the issue quite well and have open-mind but middle aged people have a prejudice against us [LGBTQ people]," says Han.
"I don’t come out to middle aged Korean people that I know here in Australia and actually I don’t even dare to talk about it with them."
Where are all the LGBTQ people in the Australian Korean community?
Researching how same-sex marriage has impacted the Australian Korean community, the SBS Korean program quickly gaines a sense of the conservative atmosphere within community.
We were unable to find any gay or lesbian figures who were openly "out" within the community. It was also difficult to find a single homosexual person of Korean background.
There were so many organisations in the community but none relating to LGBT matters. On the surface, it seemed easy to think that there were no gay or lesbian people in the Korean community in Australia.
However, Lee says he is certain that a LGBTQ population exists within the Korean community and that it’s probably more than we think.
"I have many homosexual friends whom I have known through other friends," says Lee.
"The number of them is more than you imagine because it is more liberal here in Australia than Korea and [so] they came here."
The Australian lesbian keeping Korean LGBTQ people connected
Lee and Han also connected the SBS Korean program with L*, an Australian lesbian of Caucasian appearance who is a fluent Korean speaker.
She was connected with many Korean LGBTQ people living in Australia.
L says as she came out openly it seems a bit easier for Korean gays and lesbians approach her and talk about their stories.
She says that because the Korean community in Australia is such a tight-knit society where everyone knows each other quite well, bigger fears existed that their sexual identities would become known by everyone quickly once they come out.
“Korean gay and lesbians can’t come out here because they are afraid of losing their jobs, families and friends," says L. "But it seems to me, to be easier for them to talk to me because I am an Australian."
L shares the story of a Korean lesbian friend.
"One of my friends says she could hold hands with her partner but she can’t do it here because in the Korean community everyone knows each other," says L.
"It seems to me, to be easier for them to talk to me because I am an Australian."
"I asked her to share her story through the media but she was even afraid of revealing her real voice on radio because if someone recognises her, it is possible for her to be treated differently."
Lee, who used a fake name and a different voice for the on-air interview with SBS Korean also was not comfortable to stand up openly as a gay person.
"I can talk about my sexual identity without any hesitation to non-Korean friends," says Lee. "But as it is a tight-knit community for Koreans here and I am not ready to be openly gay, I can’t introduce myself as a gay person until I know enough about the person that I talk to."
Can tight-knit Korean community learn something from broader Australia?
Reverend Young-Dae Lee is a pastor of Korean background and the leader of a congregation at a Uniting Church in Dundas and Ermington who is a long time supporter of LGBTQ rights.
A rare figure in the Korean community, Rev Lee says that generally the Korean community has ignored the LGBTQ issues.
“The Korean community in Australia mainly has been ignorant the issue," he says. "The society back in Korea hasn’t really looked into the issue with minorities."
"As we live in Australia, we should learn about how to look after and love the marginalised people [who may be] suffering.”
"There were wrong, prejudiced and misunderstood about marginalised people and I believe this may have affected the Korean community in Australia.
"However, as we live in Australia, we should learn about how to look after and love the marginalised people [who may be] suffering.”
Australian lesbian L says she ran away to Japan when she was at 20-years-old because she couldn’t handle her sexual identity issues.
She believes like her, Korean LGBTQ people might have escaped to Australia just like her.
“They probably came here to seek refuge because they are in pain," she says. "So I hope people in the Korean community welcome them and are nice to them."
"We are gay men but also human beings."
Korean gay men, Lee and Han both say they just want to be treated equally as the same human being like other straight people.
“Everyone is different and I don’t want to say that anyone is against us," says Lee. "But just because we are homosexual, it doesn’t mean we should be discriminated and hated."
"Please don’t judge LGBT people just based on their sexual identity," is Han's message. "That is just only a tiny part of one person."
"Please consider their personalities and others."
Listen to the full podcast (in Korean) by SBS Korean in the audio player above.
*Names have been changed.
