On nearly any major street in Grafton, a person can go and get ice. It’s just so readily available.
This fact seems extreme. I thought with a country like Australia, we shouldn't be in this situation. Families shouldn't be in this situation. But the truth is they are. My family is one of them.
My son Courtney was born and raised in Grafton in New South Wales. A country fellow through and through. He’s been brought up on the country lifestyle, a good, solid grounding.
Raised to have a good work ethic, he’s never gone wanting and has always been surrounded by a close knit, extended family.
In his twenties, like many other young Australians, Courtney found work in the mines. He did a lot of fly in fly out work out of Alice Springs, but kept Grafton as his base.
In this time, Courtney met his wife. He had it all – a good job, a beautiful partner, enough money to buy his boy’s toys.
But about one year ago I got a phone call that changed our lives. It was Courtney’s wife. She was distressed and crying and told me she had found evidence of drug use.
I was in shock. Stunned. I guess I was in a little denial too. It was all so new to me.
Courtney's mum Julie speaks to Dateline about his ice addiction at her home in Grafton, NSW. Source: SBS Dateline
I didn't have any idea about ice at that point in time. I had heard of it, but it wasn't part of my life, our life. It was devastating.
In hindsight, there were probably little clues, signs that we overlooked.
There were days where Courtney didn't seem quite himself, where he didn’t seem to have his usual gregarious personality, his great natural energy. He wouldn’t be able to get the normal chores done like mowing the lawn or just generally cleaning up around the place.
As a mother, I’d notice sores and say things like “Don't get bitten by mosquitoes all the time” or “You're probably low in Vitamin B.” I gave all the innocent advice of a mother.
I think there may have even been moments where Courtney tried to say something to us. But the reality seemed so far from our everyday life we never realised.
From the moment we found out about Courtney's addiction it has been a rollercoaster ride and an absolute nightmare ever since. There's no other way to describe it.
Firstly, there’s the realisation they have a problem. Then the impact on the immediate family and the extended family. And then the battle to find help. It’s one great big domino effect.
It’s been very, very traumatic for all of us. I would not wish this on any one.
There were lots and lots of times where he told us, “I’m never touching that again. No, I’ve had it. I won’t do that”.
Photos of Courtney and his family adorn the walls of their home. Source: SBS Dateline
But every time we thought we had him and he seemed to be getting better, he would fall right back into the same pattern, right back on the drug. He just could not keep away from it.
One night it all came to a head. He got very distressed and said he was desperate for help. We thought great, we’ve got our boy finally wanting help. We came together as a family and decided detox and rehab programs were the obvious choice.
I had no idea just how difficult this step would be. I thought I’d pick up the phone and get him into rehab straight away. I contacted as many as 19 different places.
There are not even proper lists you can get off the net or from hospitals. I had one list of rehabs but many I called didn’t operate any more. I could strike through half of them.
The few that were operating had such big waiting lists. Anything from four to seven months. I was gobsmacked.
Then there was the price tag. One private rehab was $5000 a day. That’s big money, unless you’re a wealthy movie star. Certainly out of our league.
I had so many sleepless nights thinking what do you do? If you can’t get into a rehab, what do you do for an addict? I had no idea what the next step would be.
Julie says she was devastated when she found out about her son Courtney's ice addiction. Source: SBS Dateline
As a mother I was feeling desperate. I wanted my son back. I was watching him slowly kill himself. I would do anything.
A friend suggested I Google rehabs in Thailand, so that’s what I did. They were all about the same cost. And importantly, there wasn’t a waiting period.
We pooled our funds that we’d saved for a holiday - around $10,000 for a 28 day program. I was beyond baulking at the cost. I needed to do something. It was that or see my son slowly die.
When I purchased the flights and booked the accommodation at the rehab I felt like a great weight was lifted off my shoulders. Even if it was for a short space of time. Finally something was happening.
When he speaks now, his voice is so much clearer. It’s a strange thing to say. He just sounds more up. But the stakes are huge.
Courtney (right) with Simon Mott, the founder of the Hope Rehab Centre in Thailand, where he went for treatment. Source: SBS Dateline
To be brutally honest I’ve got mixed feelings about what will happen next. Financially I don't think we’d be able to do this again, not over in Thailand at least. But I can't say never.
Now it’s all up to him.
Help and Support
The Australian Government National Drugs Campaign has more details of where to find help and support, or phone one of the following helplines:
- Counselling Online: 1800 888 236
- Kids Helpline: 1800 55 1800
- Family Drug Support: 1300 368 186
- Lifeline: 13 11 14
