He recalls the moment, "I was coming back from my work. And on the train, I somehow realised that I had to tell this to my mother. It was my mother's birthday. I reached home. She was busy. And I had to go out again. It was tough to say. But I was determined that day. I went to her in the kitchen and said all in one breath."
His mother's initial reaction was unexpected. She said, "It is okay. I support you the way you want to live your life."
It was a significant relief for Rishi who had been living with this secret for years. He had confided in his elder brother and sister. However, his elder sister Giti had an idea before that.
"I had a feeling that this could be a possibility since Rishi was a kid. I used to ask others to advice on how to talk to him about it. But I had learned from my other LGBT friends that Rishi should not be confronted or called out so I waited for him to be more comfortable and confident before he raised the topic with me," says Giti.
Rishi had an idea too. He could feel that he was different. He says, "Actually, the confrontation starts with the socialisation. People around you expect you to behave in a certain manner. For instance, you are expected to have a girlfriend at a certain age. And these expectations make you feel different. External expectations fail to reconcile with your feelings. And your first reaction is that something is wrong with me. But gradually comes the confirmation. With the passing of time, you tell yourself that what is being told is not right and you are different."
Rishi feels lucky to have received so much support from his family. But he knows that not all get this support. So, he, his brother Siddhant and sister Giti started an organisation FOBGAYS to support LGBTQ people of South Asian origin.
Source: Supplied
FOBGAYS+ is a grassroots community network for family and friends of South Asian LGBTAQI+ people.
FOBGAYS will march in Mardi Grass Parade 2018 as a Big Queer Indian Wedding procession known as a 'Baraat'.
Source: Supplied
