A NSW woman says she was left afraid for her life after allegedly enduring terrifying physical and verbal abuse at the hands of her "controlling" senior police officer partner.
The 40-year-old wept in court as she recounted how on one occasion during their volatile two-and-a-half-year relationship, NSW Police Superintendent Bernard Ryan allegedly picked her up by her throat and threw her on the floor in a fit of rage.
The woman, an unsworn civilian police officer, told the Downing Centre Local Court on Monday that on other occasions, Ryan, 49, spat in her face, and squeezed her wrist and poked her chest hard enough to leave bruises.
He also allegedly pushed an umbrella against her chest, called her a c*** and threatened to kick down a door after she locked herself in the bathroom.
"He was like a raging bull," she said of the September 2015 evening Ryan allegedly attacked her in a Newcastle hotel room.
Ryan was "screaming and ranting" after she left early during a night out and didn't answer his calls, she told the court.
"He picked me up by my neck with his hand and held me up.... I stopped breathing, I choked."
She said she was terrified and feared for her life.
"I just tried to grab his arm ... then when I started choking, he got scared and he threw me and I landed on the floor," she said.
Ryan eventually calmed down and fell asleep.
She said he apologised the next day and seemed upset after seeing the bruises on her neck.
The court heard the couple first got together in mid-2013 after meeting at work the previous year, when they were both married to other people.
Three months after they moved in together, she fled their southern Sydney home in the night after he allegedly became aggressive and verbally abusive.
However, they kept seeing each other and eventually moved back in together again despite frequent arguments.
Asked by crown prosecutor Matt Karpin why she didn't leave Ryan after one alleged violent episode, the woman replied, "I was still in love with him."
But the final straw came in November 2015 when Ryan, whom she described as "very controlling", allegedly pushed an umbrella against her chest and spat in her face during yet another argument.
She told him the relationship was over.
"It was for me the most degrading thing I'd ever felt in my life," she said of being spat on.
Under cross-examination, the woman denied having previously exaggerated parts of the alleged Newcastle assault, and having made up other parts of her evidence.
She also denied having lied to Ryan about fears her ex-husband was killed in a motorcycle crash - the catalyst for an alleged major argument - to get attention and create drama.
Ryan is charged with five assault offences and and one count of intimidation, and is facing a week-long hearing before a magistrate,
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