A wiser and more mature Mitchell Pearce credits his enforced layoff from the NRL and time in a Thai rehab centre as the catalyst for his career-best form.
The 28-year-old is on the cusp of an Origin recall. His man-of-the-match performance in the Sydney Roosters' Anzac Day win over St George Illawarra, which included booting the winning field goal in golden point, has gone a long way to winning over the critics who have piled on him throughout his career.
Pearce has regularly had the finger pointed at him after failing to win the Origin shield during his six series in the Blues No.7 jersey, while some would call him a scapegoat for Queensland's unprecedented recent era of domination.
And as NSW coach Laurie Daley sizes him up for the opener in Brisbane on May 31, Pearce says the eight-week suspension for his Australia Day indiscretion and subsequent time in a rehabilitation facility last year changed his life.
"I often do that to myself lately, in the quiet times I try to appreciate what I've got now," Pearce said on Fox Sports' League Life.
"Last year I was in a pretty bad place, I went away, did a lot of soul-searching and I go back to that period quite a lot when I'm feeling a bit negative or unmotivated and it certainly boosts your energy.
"We live a dream as footy players and I'm doing what I wanted to do as a kid."
Pearce hailed his stint in rehab as the one of the best things he had ever done and said it had given him a new perspective on life.
From a young age Pearce was saddled with the expectation that comes with having a famous last name and living in the shadows of his father Wayne, a Balmain, NSW and Australian great.
He made his NRL debut as a 17-year-old in 2007 and was thrust into the NSW side a year later.
He admitted he had at times found it difficult to live inside the rugby league bubble having never known anything different, saying his name had at times felt like a weight around his neck but he had learned to love and embrace his family as he got older.
"It probably comes back to my own insecurity about it, obviously there was a lot of pressure and more eyes on me from an earlier age," Pearce said.
"I remember there were stories about me (in the media) when I was playing schoolboy footy and it never sat well with me.
"I'd like to think I'm a humble person and I used to get embarrassed by that stuff. I didn't think I deserved to get more wraps than the other boys. That stuff played with my head and made me overthink situations.
"I'm at an age now when I'm comfortable with it. I'm really proud of my name."
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