Here’s what not to say to someone who’s suicidal

People are often afraid of asking “Are you okay?” because they don’t know how to respond if the answer is “No, I’m not.”

Source: SBS

Eighty thousand Australians attempt suicide each year. Three thousand die – and the ripple-effect tears through hundreds of thousands of families. This is a problem that needs an all-of-government, all-of-services response.

So today, seven of Australia’s leading suicide prevention and mental health agencies – beyondblue, Black Dog Institute, Everymind, headspace, Lifeline, ReachOut and R U OK? – joined together to launch a new campaign: #YouCanTalk.

#YouCanTalk is a direct response to a 3,000-people survey by the University of Melbourne that found most respondents believed that only mental health professionals can help prevent suicide – and 40 per cent were worried that talking about suicide might make things worse.

Some basic tips for talking to someone who might be suicidal:

DO:

• Let your mates or family member know you’ve noticed they’re behaving differently.
• Ask the question directly – “Are you having thoughts about suicide?”  Be prepared for the answer to be yes.
• Listen without judgement or criticism.
• Let them know they can always come to you.
• Let them know about online resources (check out the links below).

DON’T           

• Don’t try to fix the situation or minimise the way the person is feeling.
• Don’t avoid talking to someone for fear of saying the wrong thing. Remember: silence reinforces stigma and shame.  
• Don’t try to talk them out of suicide by reminding them 'what they’ve got going for them’ or ‘how much it would hurt others’.
• Don’t dismiss any talk of suicide as ‘attention seeking’. 

You can find a range of national resources and support at Life in Mind. And for tips on navigating conversations visit Conversations Matter.  

If you or someone you know needs urgent support, talk to someone you trust or contact a crisis support service listed below:

Adults:

• Lifeline 13 11 14 www.lifeline.org.au 
• beyondblue 1300 224 636 www.beyondblue.org.au 
• Suicide Call Back Service 1300 659 467 www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au 
• MensLine Australia 1300 789 978 www.mensline.org.au 
• QLife 1800 184 527 (3pm – 12am) www.qlife.org.au

Young people:

• Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800 www.kidshelpline.com.au  
• headspace 1800 650 890 www.headspace.org.au
• ReachOut.com www.au.reachout.com