Army reserve Cara Tongson’s decision to join the army was influenced by her brother, Jaycee Calixto, who has been serving in the Australian Defence Force for 18 years.
When Cara and her two other sisters first arrived in 2008 to join their brother Jaycee in Australia, she shares that her brother would train them like they were soldiers under his command. Her brother gave them tasks that seemed impossible and she says it pushed them to be better.
“We hated it at that time but in retrospect, I do appreciate it because it kind of built my character and that actually helped me in my recruit training when I did join.”
Cara describes it as ‘tough love.’
Jaycee shares he meant no harm in giving them difficult tasks. He was trying to impart what he learned while he was doing his training in the army and he saw that as a good opportunity to train them mentally and physically.
“When you’re given tasks, you have to try your best. Though it may seem impossible, that mental drive will make you survive a given situation,” Jaycee says.
Before enlisting in the army reserves, Cara joined the airforce cadets in her teen years. She quips that the training was a fun experience for her and helped her toughen up. She also recalls that she spent three hours of her free time every week for the cadet training.
“I was able to experience a lot of things that I wouldn’t have gotten anywhere else. I was able to fly a plane, for example. I enjoyed [the activities] and I enjoyed meeting other people,” she says.
Whilst it is common to follow an older sibling’s footsteps, having a family member in the Australian army is unique for Jaycee who has been in the army since he was 20 years old. He says that having his younger sister go through the challenges that he faced makes him feel really proud.
“I don’t get any family members at all in the army or in defence. It’s a proud moment that they’re gonna go through what I’ve gone through.”
And when the time comes that his sister would be deployed somewhere else, Jaycee feels he is ready for it.
Although Jaycee has been deployed six times overseas, every deployment brought a new experience. He recalls his deployment in Iraq as an eye-opening experience where coming back to the real world was daunting. According to the 38-year-old corporal, it is important to have people around to support him in situations where life is at risk.
“There is that uncertainty every time you step out on patrol, whether you are gonna be a target and certainly, we’ve been attacked before. But to come back, the best coping mechanism is prayer, the people that support me, family, friends, and most importantly my colleagues that have been with me through thick and thin.”
“I have had colleagues that have slipped down into that road that you can’t go back, which is quite sad, but that emphasises the importance of keeping in touch.”
Corporal Juan Carlos Calixto migrated to Australia in February 1995 and enlisted in the Australian Regular Army in May 2001, while Private Cara Tongson enlisted in the Army Reserves in 2016.
