Insight speaks with tech enthusiasts and abstainers, and those experiencing tech addictions — asking, are we too reliant on our digital devices? Watch Insight episode Your Brain On Tech Tuesday 30 September at 8.30pm on SBS or on SBS On Demand.
Growing up an only child in the 90s with parents who worked long hours, Quentin (not her real name) says TV was her babysitter.
Her relationship with technology evolved as the technology itself evolved.
"Then when the internet came, I loved the World Wide Web," Quentin, now 39, told Insight.
As a teenager, Quentin spent hours each day on MSN Messenger, ICQ, Friendster, Myspace and other early social media sites, even chatting online with strangers.
"I didn't consider my use excessive … But that's what denial is for, isn't it?"
Quentin's parents didn't know how she used the internet, but they were concerned about the amount of time she spent online.
This led to her father pulling out their home's internet modem cable in one instance.
"He had no idea that he was taking care of a future internet addict," Quentin said.
Pizza, porn and getting high
In adulthood, Quentin found herself sacrificing socialising for doomscrolling. She says her low point was in her early 30s when she was living and working overseas.
"Instead of a social life on Friday nights, I would get home from work, order a pizza, get high, and watch porn."
From this point, it took her a few years to move past denial of her self-identified media and tech addiction.
She said her husband tried to have an intervention for her and begged her to stop spending so much time on her phone.
The couple tried numerous methods to curb Quentin's internet usage, including anti-tech apps, a 90-day social media fast, changing her phone's interface to greyscale, giving her husband her passwords, and even reading books on addiction.
"The list is endless, but what I realised is all those technical solutions didn't help me.
"What I needed was a spiritual solution."
'AI is what you make it to be'
Unlike Quentin, Belle has found some positives in her considerable time spent online. Three years ago, the 21-year-old started using AI chatbots, largely for companionship.
"I found it easier to talk to a chatbot because I didn't have to look into their eyes. And, it's easier to type than talk," Belle told Insight.
As someone with autism, she says those interactions were more accessible.
"I also noticed how it helped with my social skills — especially with wording, because the bots would take everything literally ..."
The AI platform Belle used to speak to AI bots on. Source: Supplied
"I would spend [time on it] until 4am on a school morning, and then have a two-hour sleep and be back on it."
AI chatbots are not currently included in the upcoming social media ban in Australia, but Belle believes they should be.
"AI is what you make it to be. Because you basically teach it on chatbots, you teach it what to say.
"And sometimes if you say certain wording, it can go down a really dark path."
Zoey says that talking to AI bots has helped her expression and social skills. Source: SBS
Australia's social media ban
Ninety-eight per cent of high school students regularly use at least one social media platform, according to the 2024 GENERATION survey led by The Australian National University.
From December, the federal government and eSafety Commissioner will enforce a ban on a range of social media and other apps for Australians under the age of 16.
The current list under the Online Safety Amendment Act includes digital platforms including Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok and YouTube. This list may expand to include messaging platform WhatsApp and online game Roblox, among others.
Social media companies included in the ban will be required to take "reasonable steps" to prevent people under 16 from using their platforms. Non-compliance could result in fines of up to $49.5 million.
Teenage content creator Zoey, who has cultivated a TikTok following of over 14,000 users, says that this ban unfairly targets her generation.
"Social media has been around for years and it's going to stay," Zoey said.
And by taking under-16s away, you're taking us away from part of the world."
The 14-year-old has amassed her following by posting 'get ready with me' videos to her account, which her parents are logged into — monitoring her interactions with other users.
Zoey is a TikTok content creator and opposes the upcoming social media ban. Source: Supplied
"I understand how to be safe — and what's right and wrong to put on social media ...," she said.
She says that in her experiences, older people have been the ones to leave her negative comments online.
"And then from younger people, I've never really gotten anything negative."
Self-regulation technology use
Anastasia Hronis is a clinical psychologist who specialises in how the brain interacts with technology. She is concerned with how much responsibility is placed on the individual in managing technology use.
She says that tech is "absolutely" addictive, and while we can be digitally literate in many ways, big tech companies need to be held accountable.
"When tech is operating and activating neural pathways in a way that operates below our conscious awareness, it's really hard for us to manage those interactions," Hronis told Insight.
Hronis said that due to the brain not reaching its full development until between the ages of 23 to 25, younger people are more likely to struggle with this.
"[Young people] don't yet have the full capacity to understand the risks and regulate themselves in the way that's needed to access these apps," The University of Technology Sydney researcher and lecturer said.
This doesn't mean, however, that younger tech users are the only ones capable of developing addictive habits with technology.
Hronis says it is less about neuroplasticity and more about social factors when it comes to older users of digital technology.
"... Perhaps people might be more vulnerable because they're more isolated or lonely, for example, and they're using social media apps or AI bots to fill those kinds of needs."
12 steps of recovery
For Quentin, managing her technology habits required a better understanding of the addiction.
"As an internet and technology addict, I used pornography and other websites as a drug. It helped to numb my feelings, to help me cope when I was hungry or lonely or tired.
"I didn't realise at the time, but I was using tech to fill a void that could only be filled by something that was based on recovery, real recovery."
So, she joined a 12-step program modelled on Alcoholics Anonymous.
"There are meetings online where we have a fellowship of people that have a common problem, and the common solution of working the 12 steps."
Quentin says that by going through this program, she hasn't gone on many of the sites she was "compulsively using" for four years.
Support groups and 12-step programs are not the only way you can recover from addiction. There are other paths, with different methods working for other people.
Therapeutic approaches such as group and family therapy, medication for co-occurring disorders, mindfulness-based interventions (such as meditation and mindfulness-based cognitive therapy), and technology-based interventions (like internet blocking and filtering software) — and combined treatment plans — are some other methods used.
Quentin still uses tech today, but feels she has more control over the role it plays in her life.
"It's like food. But there's food that I can eat for nourishment and to help me — or there's food that I can eat … that could lead to a heart attack.
"Now I'm learning to use tech in a much more healthy way."
Readers seeking support for mental health can contact Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636. More information is available at beyondblue.org.au. Embrace Multicultural Mental Health supports people from culturally and linguistically diverse backgrounds.
And for more stories on sex, relationships, health, wealth, grief and more, head to Insightful — an SBS podcast series hosted by Kumi Taguchi. Follow us on the SBS Audio App, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
