I was a single parent just trying to survive. Then a new hobby changed everything

Rather than being at home, Bridget Hallam always wanted to be "out in the world, living life". Then she found a way to do that.

Bridget Hallam was introduced to a new lifestyle when she started dating her partner. Source: Supplied

Is escaping from reality helping or harming us? In this episode of Insight, we hear from Australians trying to find identity and liberation in escapism, and ask whether this is a good thing. Watch on SBS On Demand.

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Escaping Reality

episode • Insight • 

News And Current Affairs • 

51m

episode • Insight • 

News And Current Affairs • 

51m

I grew up on a farm on the mid-north coast of NSW, which was idyllic albeit limiting.

"There's got to be more to life than this," is a thought that lived in my head for many, many years growing up.

But while living on a farm was somewhat mundane, I was fortunate enough to ride horses.

Feeling the physical power of my horse beneath me and the wind in my face, I felt my first thrill of freedom.

And I wanted more.

Fast forward 20 years, and my life was very different to the one I lived on the farm.

I lived in a big city — a single parent working hard to raise two children.

My sole focus was being a good mum, and emotionally and financially surviving.

It was a very challenging period of my life.

Escaping daily routine

After five years of being single, I decided to try online dating in 2012.

I set up a dating profile and browsed for a potential partner.

One man's profile caught my attention with his bio: "Motorcycles are my meditation ... I have a spare helmet."

I clicked 'yes' and messaged Alan, who would soon become my partner — and still is to this day.

He took me for a short motorcycle ride on our second date.

From then on, I was hooked on riding.

The cool night air, the purr of the engine and squeezing Alan between my thighs was exciting and romantic.

Bridget and Alan in Romania. Source: Supplied

Motorcycle adventures quickly became central to our relationship.

Every other weekend, we'd lean into twisty mountain corners and sweep around curves in the countryside.

Amid my routine as a single mum and the difficulties of my daily life, this was an escape.

Over 200,000km across 45 countries

Alan and I have been together for almost 14 years, and our motorcycle escapes vary from day rides in Australia to almost year-long rides in Europe.

Our first big trip was in 2019.

Inspired by the Tour de France bicycle route, we shipped his motorbike to Barcelona and travelled to 26 countries by motorbike for 24 weeks.

The moment we got home, we knew we had to do it again.

A stop in Senj, Croatia. Source: Supplied

Now, Alan and I have ridden two-up (on one motorcycle) over 200,000km across 45 countries — recently arriving home from our fourth big trip, which took eight and a half months.

We'd usually hit the road by nine in the morning and ride into the afternoon for about five or six hours, set up our tent and camp or find a small hotel for the night.

We both work remotely, and our laptops fit nicely in our luggage. We'd work a couple of hours most evenings, or stop somewhere for a couple of days to dedicate time to work.

I love being a digital nomad, but sometimes it means using a campground ironing board as a desk.

Living on our motorbike has become normal for us.

'Focus or die'

Riding solo is a whole different experience from riding pillion (as a motorcyclist passenger), where I can mostly relax and enjoy the scenery.

When I started riding a motorcycle solo, it felt like "focus or die".

Taking a corner a bit too wide or not noticing a driver pulling out from a side street could mean death or serious injury.

So, with this intense need for concentration, I found riding on my own to be both exhilarating and calming.

There's only room for thoughts about the road ahead.

Community and camaraderie

For a long time, I've held somewhat of a mantra that I don't want to be at home tending the petunias.

I want to be out in the wild world, living life.

Even when I'm cold, tired, hungry, cranky and sleeping in a tent on the road, I never think of giving up my lifestyle for a safe, comfortable one.

Bridget on a motorcycle trip in Italy during a heatwave. Source: Supplied

Alan and I say to each other that when we can't manage two-wheeled bikes, we'll just get three-wheeled ones.

It's one of those things that is said in jest, but it's probably true.

We met an 88-year-old fellow rider on the road last year and he was still riding strong.

I find there's also great camaraderie in the community. When you pass a motorcyclist coming the other way, there's the little nod to each other of 'I see you, I acknowledge you'.

And at a lunch pub stop, someone will inevitably wander over to us and say, "nice bike". It'll start a conversation, which would never happen if we were in a car.

The time will come when we can't continue riding. But we'll deal with that when we get there.

'The petunias can wait'

In the period just before I became a motorcyclist, I was a single mother just trying to get by.

Then motorbikes opened my world and gave me a new lease on life. I found the freedom and passion I was looking for.

Riding may have started as a way to escape, but it's now become part of my identity.

My adventures will come to an end one day, but I'll take comfort in knowing I lived life to the fullest.

For now, the petunias can wait.

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