My name is Tyrell, I am 16 years old and I am from Sydney. I come from a very multi-cultural family.
Mum is Filipino, Dad is South African, stepdad is Indonesian and stepmum is Chinese-Fijian. My parents separated not long after my first birthday however nothing much changed for me other than living arrangements. I would move between homes and spend lots of time with my grandparents.
My Mum’s family is Seventh-Day Adventist, Dad’s family (as is my stepmum) is Catholic and my stepdad is Muslim. As a result I have grown up visiting many types of churches and mosques. Eid is a very special day for my stepdad and I really enjoy going to the mosque with him and spending the day with my Indonesian family. I don’t really know what I’m doing but I enjoy the atmosphere.
Mum read me Buddhist books growing up so I guess that has also shaped me, along with my close relationship with both my grandmothers. One grandmother grew up in a 3rd world country and the other lived through the apartheid so they really help to keep me grounded, humble and hard-working.
Ty and his family. Front: stepmum, Leola, and dad, Mervyn. Back: mum, Sheila, and stepdad, Jodia. Source: Saber Baluch/Insight
My stepdad came into my life just before I was three. I can’t really remember life without him. I started calling him Dad when I started kindy. We are really close, I am probably most like him in terms of interests. We have done quite a bit of travel together so we have lots of personal jokes. I usually go to him to talk about music, art and fashion. I think I’m pretty lucky. We have always joked that if he and Mum split up that I would go with him.
My stepmum came into my life when I was five. She’s really nice and we have been through a lot as a family. She had an aneurysm about five years ago and we almost lost her, it was a really difficult time for my Dad. Leola really cares for me and even came with Mum and I to Fiji when I represented Australia for the Oceania Championships. Her family came to all my races, brought instruments and wore Fijian embellishments. It was pretty special.
Raising eyebrows
The hardest thing about being in my particular situation is constantly trying to make sense of the situation. I know it’s unusual. The other parents often laugh and call them ‘Team Tyrell’. All my parents, grandmas, aunts and uncles attend most of my races, games and big events. They are loud and take up a lot of room. My parents were young when they had me so the whole situation raises eyebrows and often requires an explanation.
When there are parent meetings or medical appointments I never know who will turn up.
My parents all have a group chat. They make decisions together, in consultation with me. It’s good and bad. Good because my Mum can overreact and my Dad help's to calm her down and gain a more calm perspective. Also good because they can make sound and fair decisions together (as a team). It can be bad because I have to get my story straight, they can easily catch me out and they collectively witness my failures. Worst is when they all gang up on me and tease me when I stuff up. It’s all in good fun and we really do have a good laugh about it. It teaches me to be accountable for myself though and it forces me to build a really good argument when I need to voice my needs and concerns.
When there are parent meetings or medical appointments I never know who will turn up. They just put it in the group chat and whoever is available will be with me. Sometimes it’s all four of them and other times it will be either just the Dads or just the Mums - which confuses everyone.
I am thankful and lucky to be in the the situation that I am in and I wouldn’t want it to be any different, I love them so much. You’re a product of your environment and I’m thankful to be surrounded by these people as they’ve always put me above themselves and pushed me to become the best version of myself. They’ve guided me through life and I can safely say that all four of them have played a fundamental and profound role in making me into the man I am today.
