I tried drugs for the first time when I was in my first year of uni, and I told my parents about it almost straightaway.
The first thing they did was listen. They saw I was excited, and they knew cutting me off would make it seem like they “just didn’t get it” so they didn’t even interject when I said things that I now know to be kind of dumb and dangerous. Only when I’d said everything I wanted to did they chime in.
I told them the truth: I enjoyed the heightened sense of connectedness I had with the people around me; I felt inspired, creative – even the music sounded better.
My parents couldn’t deny how that particular trip had made me feel great, but they explained how no two trips are ever the same.
My mum made it very clear to me that my safety is her number one priority and I could discuss anything with her without fear of judgement or reprimand.
Perhaps more than anything, this first chat about drugs was an opportunity for my parents to check in to see if I was happy. We spoke about how addiction can take the reins when you don’t know how to feel good without drugs. And that’s key. We need to be honest about why people experiment with their state of mind in the first place. Sometimes it’s because we’re uninspired about life. If this is the case, then chatting about drugs can open the door to a much bigger conversation about mental health.
Too often, kids fear their parents’ wrath more than drugs – so if they have a bad reaction after taking drugs and need help they will be too afraid to call their parents. Imagine a girl has a bad reaction after trying cannabis and needs her Ventolin puffer, but she tells her friends not to take her home to get the puffer because she doesn’t want her parents to see her when she’s high. This is tragic and more than a little ironic – no parent wants to be the reason a bad situation is made worse.
My mum made it very clear to me that my safety is her number one priority and I could discuss anything with her without fear of judgement or reprimand. If I planned on taking drugs, she wanted to know what, when, where and which friends would be there. And, after all that, if ever something when wrong and I needed her help, I should never hesitate to call her.
I knew my parents hoped that I wouldn’t want to experiment with drugs anymore. But they knew not to push the point. If they pushed too hard, I would push back – I was a young person, after all.
Here's what I learned from listening to my parents:
- I always ate a proper meal before I took drugs
- I always took a very small dose of a drug to see how my body reacted before I took more
- I made sure I took drugs with people I trusted, so that I would be supported if something went wrong. Ideally, someone in the group would not take drugs.
- I was aware of dosage, much the same way we’re taught in health class at school about how to measure standard drinks when consuming different kinds of alcohol
- I only ever took drugs in familiar and safe environments
- I understood that different people react to the same batch of drugs differently
- I understood that even after taking all of these precautions we can never know what’s in a drug and we can always have a bad reaction
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B. Smith is a case worker for young people trying to break the cycle of inter-generational poverty. Prior to this, she was a youth worker helping young people make educated choices around safe sex and drug use. Her Instagram handle is @triplecreambre.
