As an active, able-bodied person before my accident, I found it extremely difficult to accept my disability. In my mind I was still able and “normal”, but in reality my life had forever changed.
In 1998, I wrapped my car around a pole. I suffered a diffuse axonal brain injury, which means my brain was smashed around the inside of my skull, damaging it all over.
After waking up from my five-month coma, I went into denial. My thoughts were that this injury wasn’t permanent; that it would just take a little longer for me to fully recover.
But the doctors didn’t think my sense of balance would ever return. I realised that I could fall and seriously injure myself, and even die, at any time by doing “normal” everyday things, which are taken for granted.
Louise in hospital after her accident. Photo: Supplied Source: Supplied
The accident has affected my gait. There’s no fluidity in my movements and I talk funny.
Before the accident when I heard music, I would dance and sing because that was innate to me. Sports, jazz and ballroom were my passion. After the accident, I initially thought that if I couldn’t dance, my life might as well be over. I was still dancing but only in my mind.
Having a disability, life is not bad and not good. At first I’d try not to make it obvious, forgetting I was in a wheelchair.
I have not only made it through such a horrific accident, I have been living independently in the community for the past five years. That in itself has been a huge achievement for me.
Things are the way they are, so rather than wallowing in self-pity, I just get on with doing what I can.
Through sport, I found myself achieving and it has given me a sense of purpose and responsibility.
Louise at the London Paralympics. Photo: Supplied Source: Supplied
I have become a successful international athlete, breaking world records in shot put and travelling the world winning medals in the Paralympics, Commonwealth Games and World Championships.
Three days before I won a bronze medal in the 2016 Rio Paralympics, the short film I wrote and produced, With Little Hope, had its premiere at the Canberra Short Film Festival where it won Best Cinematography. It also went on to win Best Short Film at the 2016 Cinema New York City Film Festival.
I wrote the film, inspired by some of my experiences, in appreciation for the surgeons, emergency services, nurses and everyone who was involved in my care and saving my life.
It was only through necessity that I have accepted my disability.
What kept me going, I have no doubt, was the love, respect, acceptance and support of my family. I wasn’t treated any differently. I am so lucky to have my family. I love my mum being right there beside me every day, and Dad, knowing how important music is to me, has taken me to many festivals and gigs, making me feel normal.
Like anyone, I have good days and bad days. With a brain injury, life becomes unpredictable and I fall often. I also have bipolar disorder and see a psychologist, psychiatrist, physiotherapist and my GP, regularly.
I continue broadening my horizons and progressing with my screenwriting, hoping to build a career with the hundreds of ideas in my head. I have a couple of ideas for TV series I’m working on at the moment.
I would also love to find my soul mate, marry and have a family.
My motto is: always try to do the best you can, be the best you can be and never give up.
